what can I tell you about my journey thus far?
it is a terrible plight: this thing called life. terrible and wonderful all wrapped up in a question of “what the hell am I doing?” there is constant questioning and wondering and planning followed by no answers, only more to wonder after, and failed plans.
being an artist is one of the toughest professions because it entangles our emotions, relies upon our own creation, can destroy us from the inside out, and demands all our time without giving us what society considers necessary: money.
being an artist creates good and strong people (especially if you have to fight for your place). Having to prove my worth and ability over the past eight years has strengthened my resolve, but the in the moment dealing of proving and re-proving myself? those moments were terrifying, painful, and broke me.
I still feel broken – broken my the constant demand of life to prove who I am and where I’m going
but I can still tell you: I do believe its worth. Honestly.
I’m in a low place, I’m in a valley if you will.
I’m still confident there’s an up coming my way – here’s to searching for it.