I loved you with every inch of my frame
and I would not be who I am at this moment
without having met you.
I know I should revel in the fact I had the honor
to spend a few nights beside you,
a few days hand in hand with you,
but tonight I revel in the tears rolling down my flushed cheeks
as I remember the grandeur of what you had me feeling.
You were everything I needed
and never knew I wanted….
you were the unexpected man who taught me what I want,
You taught me, who ‘me’ could actually be
and there was, early on, this love in your eyes.
I find it hard to believe you’ve lost that love,
I choose to believe you love being on your own that much more,
you’re not as open as you thought to the love a girl like me can offer.
I love you.
I will always love you.
This is, perhaps, the worst thing I have ever written – but it had to be written.
Here’s to getting it all out.
So maybe some day I can feel like myself again.
I can be me.
I can be the loving girl for someone else, someone better…..
of course right now – the only someone I wish I had is you.
I want to tell you I miss you.
I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with you – honestly.
I wanted you – I still do.
And I’m terrified you’re going to abandon me. To disappear.